How To Stop Caring What Others Think Of You
Do you ever take time to think and wonder what other people are thinking about you? It’s kind of a normal thing to do. I’m Kris Krohn and today on REITV, we’re going to be exploring what you can do about that whether it’s productive, counterproductive, and how you can ultimately step in your life where you don’t have to wait for other people to improve of you. Calling all people pleasers! Right, if you’re worrying about what people think about you ultimately you are likely a people pleaser. I got another word for you, do not be offended. Unless you choose to. You’re a liar. You change actually who you want to be so that you can conform what others want you to be. And you know what? Sometimes conforming is a really good thing. Like in my church, there’s some things I conform to they are for my betterment. But there’s many other opportunities and many other things in life where we’re frankly just being a lie. We’re not being true to who we are. And that’s because as people pleasers like a mask, and mask that we have the opportunity to take off. So how do you stop living without needing and requiring the validation of others? Is to start by just learning this one simple truth. As long as you live in a world where you require the validation of others, you will always put yourself in powerless circumstances. Because you can never get enough of what you don’t need. Because what you don’t need can never satisfy you. Ultimately the only person that can validate you is who? It’s you. Validation from other people, it’s, it’s never going to mean as much to you as you hope it would because it feels you up for just a second and then you know what it does? Vanishes away. And then you need more of it. And then you go fishing for compliments and you want people to know that they’re okay with you that they’re happy with you. That’s called being insecure my friend. And trust me, I know this is for somebody who’s really hard stuff to hear but I used to be one of the most insecure human beings on the planet. I was king people pleaser. I thought that the purpose of my life was to validate everyone else’s existence so that they could be nice to me because the idea of living in this world without someone liking me, it felt just as painful as death. That’s pretty extreme but that’s how I felt. That’s how I felt about it. How do you learn to validate yourself? First of all just pause and take inventory on what you’re doing if you just did a project and you feel good about it, you can go ask the teacher, the friend, the business partner, “how did i do?” Right? you know come on feed that ego a little bit. Instead just pause right now and get yourself grounded with me close your eyes, take a deep breath in. And just ask this question, “where do you need validation in your life?” is that how you show up in your career? or how you show up with a friend? where is that? and instead of now waiting for them, what are the words that you’ve been longing to hear? and they’re not going to come from somebody else are going to come with me “Kris good job” “Good job for, how you showed up for that person and chose to serve them. You made a great choice there. Good work.” Right? When those words come from me I’ve got the ability in any given moment to acknowledge my greatness acknowledge the choices that I’m making I’m also the same person that gets to acknowledge what I foul up and do it all wrong upside down and backwards. Be that person that can show up for you. It might be a great idea for you people pleasers to become ex people pleasers. Here’s how you do it, stop requiring the validation of others. Say a little silent prayer every day. Please God save me from the desire to have approval of other people. And, instead, take time every morning. What do I get to feel validated on? and then give that validation. Good job at the gym today. You really worked hard to doing a great job. Hey, way to go on losing those two pounds. Be that person. Because this is that self-talk that ultimately we are living in a world where everyone else is our perception but there’s only one person that is absolutely one hundred percent real to you. And that starts with you. Don’t do it the other way around where you’re requiring everyone else to show up in certain ways and say certain things so that you can be okay with who you are as a human being. I hope you’ve enjoyed today’s mindset video. You know, the most important real estate we own is the real estate between our ears and when we get it set straight just like the numbers on a deal, we’re able to create far more favorable outcomes. So, you can certainly look forward to seeing a lot more videos. where, we’re going to be talking about the right kind of mindset that cultivates a belief system in the world of abundance that world that’s going to help deliver the results in things that you’re really looking for in life. Thanks for joining today. Subscribe for more videos and we’ll see on the next one.